How to Increase Self-Love

Most of us know what increase self-love is but do not understand it. You eat because you understand that you need nourishment. It is sad that most of us are trying to conquer external battles like finding love, finding success, or finding happiness, but we do not understand that self-love is the root from which everything grows.

Before you continue you might like to consider our free worksheet on exploring “Crush Self-Doubt”. Please download this worksheet here.

Without self-love, we tend to be constantly down on ourselves, not believe in our abilities, and not be grateful for our positive traits. If we can cultivate this love, however, we can come to appreciate ourselves, accept our flaws, and celebrate what makes us different. People who have self-love tend to stress less and achieve more, as well as have more successful relationships.

There are a few shifts you can make to lead yourself in the direction of self-love. First, don’t assign negative labels to yourself, such as “lazy” or “worthless,” and work to shift any of these labels you already identify with into positive ones. Even if you do perform negatively in some aspects of life, forgive yourself for your mistakes. Adopt the belief that through your efforts you can facilitate improvements.

Another step to self-love is working to actively take care of yourself, but not depriving yourself of pleasure. Healthy eating is an important part of self-love because if you appreciate your body, you want to see it flourish, but it is still important to allow yourself to enjoy food. Staying active also shows investment into your well-being, but torturing yourself with excess exercise can reflect disapproval of yourself and be used as punishment. Make sure you get adequate sleep too. Don’t deprive yourself of your 8 hours!

Self-love also shows up in the way you interact with others. Make sure you are setting boundaries and making others aware of when your needs aren’t being met. Assert yourself and express your opinions instead of passively dismissing your ideas and feelings. Surround yourself with people who are accepting and encouraging. When you have love for yourself, you are less inclined to let others step over you. It is also important to prioritize your health and happiness over relationships. Understand that you deserve to feel your best and to not have to give all your energy to others.

Try to connect with others in real life more so than on social media. Excessive social media use facilitates self-comparison that can drag down your image of yourself. Social media also teaches you to work for the acceptance of others instead of acceptance from yourself. You are constantly rewarded by others with likes and follows, which blocks you from seeking approval internally.

There are also some activities you can do to cultivate self-love. One option is to write a love letter to yourself. In the letter, make sure that you highlight your most valuable qualities. Then, consider how these qualities have benefited your life. Finally, end with a reflection on how you can honor these parts of you in your day to day life.

A simpler task for increasing self-love is saying positive affirmations. Look in the mirror and reaffirm several positive statements. Some ideas include, “I am worthy,” “I love myself,” and “I believe in myself.” It is really helpful to say them first thing in the morning because it sets your day up for gratitude and success. Then, throughout your day, whenever you accomplish something, no matter how big or small, notice it and celebrate it.

Start making small shifts to align your life with these habits, but be patient. Increase self-love can take years to fully cultivate, but if you stick with it, one day you’ll love yourself just like you love any other person in your life.

 

Ready to quiet your inner critic and start embracing who you truly are? Download our free ‘Crush Self-Doubt Workbook’ and take your first step toward lasting self-love and confidence.